Regardless of the amount of love, care, and affection that exists between two siblings, there’s still room for sibling rivalry featuring feelings of jealousy, competition, and fighting.
With more than one child in the house, parents often find themselves playing referee between their kids, which can leave them quite frustrated, overwhelmed, and exhausted.
In most cases, the resentment starts right after the birth of the second child, evolving into constant sibling rivalry, which often lasts throughout childhood.
What Is Sibling Rivalry?
Sibling rivalry is best described as the ongoing conflict that occurs between two or more children raised in the same family. It doesn’t only happen with blood-related siblings but can also take place between foster siblings, step-siblings, and adopted siblings.
It is usually characterized by the following:
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- Constant bickering
- Verbal fighting
- Physical fighting
- Feelings of envy
- Resentment towards one another
- Jealousy
- Constantly competing for parental competition
- Name-calling
- Tattling
Different Factors That Lead to Sibling Rivalry
Sibling rivalry may usually stem from the birth of the second or third child and so on, but there are many other factors that influence it, resulting in different kinds of conflicts.
Take a look at the many forms of sibling rivalry and the main causes behind it.
Demanding Attention
Children are always demanding attention from their parents and also try different ways and tactics when they don’t get it. However, this can prove to be extremely challenging for almost every parent, particularly for those who work and have 9-5 jobs.
So, the busier the parents get, the more demanding the children become in an attempt to get their attention.
In the case of the arrival of the second child, for instance, the firstborn finds it very hard to accept that their position or place has been taken by someone else. Naturally, the parents’ attention is likely to be focused more on the former, who has increased needs to be catered to. As a result of this, the first child is likely going to act out, misbehave with their parents and even cry a lot to get the attention they want.
The Need for Individuality
Children generally have a natural inclination to stand out, set themselves apart from others, including their siblings. Each child is trying to compete to define who they are as an individual and the unique skills or talents they possess. During their journey of discovering who they are, children try to explore their strengths, skills, activities, and interests. In this particular case, they do this to show their parents that they are different from their siblings.
This constant need for individuality often sparks competition between siblings to see who is better at things. For instance, it could be something as basic as who can eat faster, who can race the fastest car, or who can make a better house out of Legos.
In doing so, they also tend to turn to their parents to ask for their opinions and views and what they have to say about it. While this may seem stupid or trivial to us, it matters a great deal to children.
